I didn't even realize that there were "family bloggers" on social media who essentially made their children into money makers until I heard about the case of Ruby Frankie and her now defunct "eight passengers" YouTube channel. Have you ever heard of this story? Note that I called it a "case" because the vlogger (Ruby Frankie) is now in prison for up to thirty years for absolutely unimaginable child abuse. I hope she serves the entirety of it too with no early release for good behavior. She did unspeakable things to her children and never took any responsibility for it. Watching interviews with her, she comes off as an obvious narcissist. I'm sure that a lot of those people who essentially put their children to work on social media also have some form of Cluster B personality pathology. You're definitely not alone in finding it revolting and distasteful.
Thank you for saying this! I always feel like I'm the last to know something, especially when that something has been around for years.
Oh I forgot about Ruby Frankie! Sheesh, that's how I heard about it first too lol. I just watched the documentary about her. Just gross. I thought the same, that she's a narcissist. It's so nice to talk to someone who sees the same things I do! Not that we're anomolies, it's just I forget sometimes that Alisha is my only in-person human so when I point stuff like this out, she isn't able to see it. 😆
That's understandable. I too, sometimes feel like I miss out on things that are commonly known to most people. I haven't seen the Ruby Frankie documentary yet but I've watched lots of reports about the case, including the trial. I sometimes like True Crime documentaries.
Narcissism is one of those things that unless you've dealt with a few narcissistic individuals, and/or have read about NPD, it's not likely that you'll pick up on any of the telltale signs. But once you do, the patterns are as predictable as the rising and setting of the sun. Im glad that I'm not the only one who can spot these things in high profile cases.
Ruby Frankie always reminded me of one of my past girlfriends who in hindsight, was an obvious narcissist. In fact that was how I ended up learning about narcissism and other Cluster B personality pathologies. In watching interviews with Ruby Frankie, you can see how she has this constantly impressionistic speech and unnecessarily dramatic affect. Plus the often evasive way that she answers questions, again, even if you didn't know about the crimes she committed, those mannerisms would come off as clear Cluster B red flags to someone who knew what to look for.
True crime is one of those things that feels like something of a guilty pleasure for me but sometimes it's interesting from a psychological and sociological standpoint.
Dude you'd make such a great therapist! You're so wise. If this makes you feel better, "reality" TV is my guilty pleasure. I'm still a true crime nerd. For years I bought tons of books, watched tons of docs, even went to college for psychology. Even was obsessed with Court TV back when it was called that. People fascinate me, even the gross ones.
Your exes sounds a lot like one of mine. Looking back, I was so naive. He was very charming and manipulative. And I have narcissistic family members too yet didn't notice the signs. I'm not proud of how I went about breaking things off with him, but I am happy that it was because of him I ended up studying NPD and other personality disorders. Now I can spot them in the wild!
Thank you 😹 Others have also told me that I should be a therapist. Interestingly enough, during my first year as an undergrad in college, I debated on whether to major in anthropology, sociology, or psychology. And of course I ended up majoring in anthropology--possibly because it was the longer standing interest of mine. But there can also be a lot of interdisciplinary overlap between all three disciplines too.
Yep, just about every one of my exes had very obvious narcissistic traits. And the more I learned about it the more I learned that this was likely a result of having been raised by a narcissistic mother and I was the family scapegoat growing up. I suspect that neurodivergent people who are brought up in narcissistic family systems might be especially vulnerable to falling into narcissistic relationships as adults. And a lot of times being in those types of relationships can cause a person to act in ways that they later regret--much like you describe not being proud of how you left your ex. Narcissists are often such callous and unreasonable people as to evoke feelings in us that can be very difficult to reckon with
I too can now spot narcissists out in the wild pretty easily. And quite frankly I can see why so many social psychologists have long talked about a narcissism epidemic. Just look at what's happening with our administration. Such cluster B personality pathologies have become so prevalent as to have now permeated our institutions in very overt ways. One Substack that I subscribe to and love to read is Dr. Bandy Lee where she frames the MAGA phenomenon as part of a cult mentality, brought on by mass psychosis. I think that's exactly what it is. Having debated MAGA followers, I can say that there is no appealing to them through reason. They always defer to fear,hatred, and untenable folklore.
Oh yeah, I remember Court TV. I used to be absolutely addicted to that channel. One thing about true crime is that as fascinating as the underlying social psychology of it might be, I can only watch interviews with the perpetrators in small doses. I feel the same way about watching interviews and press conferences with MAGA politicians. Having delt directly with so many cluster B personality types, I find their mannerisms to be absolutely nauseating.
Crazy how much of what we went through mirrors each other. Narcissistic parents, the scapegoat role, getting sucked into toxic relationships because we were conditioned to normalize chaos. You’re right it’s not just trauma, it’s a pattern, and neurodivergent people especially get trapped in it because we feel everything and want to understand everything.
And yeah, watching interviews with perps now feels like emotional acid reflux. The dramatics, fake concern, constant deflection ... it’s all so transparent once you’ve seen it up close.
The MAGA stuff is just the macro version of the same dynamic: manipulation, cult logic, no accountability. I'm checking out that Substack you mentioned, thank you!
You're welcome. Yep Bandy Lee also does vlogs on YouTube about the mass psychosis facing our nation and has written books about it. I think that framing it as a mass psychosis is more accurate and thus less more productive in the sense that it leads to the understanding that this is an issue that might be best addressed on a social psychological level rather than an epistemological level through reasoned and informed debate.
I didn't even realize that there were "family bloggers" on social media who essentially made their children into money makers until I heard about the case of Ruby Frankie and her now defunct "eight passengers" YouTube channel. Have you ever heard of this story? Note that I called it a "case" because the vlogger (Ruby Frankie) is now in prison for up to thirty years for absolutely unimaginable child abuse. I hope she serves the entirety of it too with no early release for good behavior. She did unspeakable things to her children and never took any responsibility for it. Watching interviews with her, she comes off as an obvious narcissist. I'm sure that a lot of those people who essentially put their children to work on social media also have some form of Cluster B personality pathology. You're definitely not alone in finding it revolting and distasteful.
And thank you for the shares, that's so kind ❤️
No problem. I always share content that I feel someone else might enjoy or benefit from 😊
Thank you for saying this! I always feel like I'm the last to know something, especially when that something has been around for years.
Oh I forgot about Ruby Frankie! Sheesh, that's how I heard about it first too lol. I just watched the documentary about her. Just gross. I thought the same, that she's a narcissist. It's so nice to talk to someone who sees the same things I do! Not that we're anomolies, it's just I forget sometimes that Alisha is my only in-person human so when I point stuff like this out, she isn't able to see it. 😆
That's understandable. I too, sometimes feel like I miss out on things that are commonly known to most people. I haven't seen the Ruby Frankie documentary yet but I've watched lots of reports about the case, including the trial. I sometimes like True Crime documentaries.
Narcissism is one of those things that unless you've dealt with a few narcissistic individuals, and/or have read about NPD, it's not likely that you'll pick up on any of the telltale signs. But once you do, the patterns are as predictable as the rising and setting of the sun. Im glad that I'm not the only one who can spot these things in high profile cases.
Ruby Frankie always reminded me of one of my past girlfriends who in hindsight, was an obvious narcissist. In fact that was how I ended up learning about narcissism and other Cluster B personality pathologies. In watching interviews with Ruby Frankie, you can see how she has this constantly impressionistic speech and unnecessarily dramatic affect. Plus the often evasive way that she answers questions, again, even if you didn't know about the crimes she committed, those mannerisms would come off as clear Cluster B red flags to someone who knew what to look for.
True crime is one of those things that feels like something of a guilty pleasure for me but sometimes it's interesting from a psychological and sociological standpoint.
Dude you'd make such a great therapist! You're so wise. If this makes you feel better, "reality" TV is my guilty pleasure. I'm still a true crime nerd. For years I bought tons of books, watched tons of docs, even went to college for psychology. Even was obsessed with Court TV back when it was called that. People fascinate me, even the gross ones.
Your exes sounds a lot like one of mine. Looking back, I was so naive. He was very charming and manipulative. And I have narcissistic family members too yet didn't notice the signs. I'm not proud of how I went about breaking things off with him, but I am happy that it was because of him I ended up studying NPD and other personality disorders. Now I can spot them in the wild!
Thank you 😹 Others have also told me that I should be a therapist. Interestingly enough, during my first year as an undergrad in college, I debated on whether to major in anthropology, sociology, or psychology. And of course I ended up majoring in anthropology--possibly because it was the longer standing interest of mine. But there can also be a lot of interdisciplinary overlap between all three disciplines too.
Yep, just about every one of my exes had very obvious narcissistic traits. And the more I learned about it the more I learned that this was likely a result of having been raised by a narcissistic mother and I was the family scapegoat growing up. I suspect that neurodivergent people who are brought up in narcissistic family systems might be especially vulnerable to falling into narcissistic relationships as adults. And a lot of times being in those types of relationships can cause a person to act in ways that they later regret--much like you describe not being proud of how you left your ex. Narcissists are often such callous and unreasonable people as to evoke feelings in us that can be very difficult to reckon with
I too can now spot narcissists out in the wild pretty easily. And quite frankly I can see why so many social psychologists have long talked about a narcissism epidemic. Just look at what's happening with our administration. Such cluster B personality pathologies have become so prevalent as to have now permeated our institutions in very overt ways. One Substack that I subscribe to and love to read is Dr. Bandy Lee where she frames the MAGA phenomenon as part of a cult mentality, brought on by mass psychosis. I think that's exactly what it is. Having debated MAGA followers, I can say that there is no appealing to them through reason. They always defer to fear,hatred, and untenable folklore.
Oh yeah, I remember Court TV. I used to be absolutely addicted to that channel. One thing about true crime is that as fascinating as the underlying social psychology of it might be, I can only watch interviews with the perpetrators in small doses. I feel the same way about watching interviews and press conferences with MAGA politicians. Having delt directly with so many cluster B personality types, I find their mannerisms to be absolutely nauseating.
Crazy how much of what we went through mirrors each other. Narcissistic parents, the scapegoat role, getting sucked into toxic relationships because we were conditioned to normalize chaos. You’re right it’s not just trauma, it’s a pattern, and neurodivergent people especially get trapped in it because we feel everything and want to understand everything.
And yeah, watching interviews with perps now feels like emotional acid reflux. The dramatics, fake concern, constant deflection ... it’s all so transparent once you’ve seen it up close.
The MAGA stuff is just the macro version of the same dynamic: manipulation, cult logic, no accountability. I'm checking out that Substack you mentioned, thank you!
You're welcome. Yep Bandy Lee also does vlogs on YouTube about the mass psychosis facing our nation and has written books about it. I think that framing it as a mass psychosis is more accurate and thus less more productive in the sense that it leads to the understanding that this is an issue that might be best addressed on a social psychological level rather than an epistemological level through reasoned and informed debate.